Thursday, February 05, 2009

prenatal yoga

So my sister wanted us to have a fertile sharing moment and we went to prenatal yoga together. I am uncertain as to how I feel about this experience. For starters, I don't think I'm quite pregnant enough to go. I had by far the smallest stomach in the room and I felt like people were staring and judging my belly, questioning why I should be there for their attempted zen moments when I don't yet have feet kicking my ribs.

And then I farted during camel pose. Audibly. This was initially extremely embarrassing. So much so that I almost left. But then everyone started farting. Pregnant women always fart, it seems. That room smelled like a big, stinky butt.

The teacher began walking around and showing us how our partners could assist us into the postures to relieve pressure and rub the baby to stimulate motion and love, and it started to seem like a really nice place to be. And the postures all felt so good and involved such audible exhalations. Even though I'm not super pregnant, it all felt wonderful and, actually, zen-like.

However, there were negatives. Like the teacher was a little weird and people kept coming in very late. I am such an anxious person that it takes me forever to quiet my mind and get in a place of calm. Once I got in there, in tune with my breath, etc., another woman would stagger in late (up to a half hour late) and make us all get up and slide our mats over to make room for her. Let's just say I don't want to be friends with any of those women. I don't think that my overly expressive face emitted kind looks in their direction, either. I might have given them all the raging stink eye. Or willed my fart smells toward their personal nostrils.

I'm going to give yoga two more chances, though, because I purchased a multi-class pass (can't overlook a bargain...). My goals for next time are to NOT eat chili the day of class, to move my mat close to the front where I won't be asked to move to accommodate an asshole tardy person, and to have a bigger stomach so as to better fit in with the moms-to-be.


Laura V said...

Where did you go? I've been considering taking a few prenatal yoga classes because my home practice is getting harder what with the baby belly.

east side girl said...

This made me laugh out loud! I guess if you can fart anywhere in public, it's a prenatal yoga class.

I'm not a fan of going to classes, but I did use a great yoga dvd when I was prego (until they put me on bed rest). It's Prenatal Vinyasa Yoga with Jennifer Wolfe. It's got variations on the poses to suit your stage in can fart all you want...and there's no one coming in late to class.